What Inspires Me

 I am taking a detour from my personal journey to list some of the things that inspire me. What prompted me to take this detour was The Story of Jenni.  It is an amazing story of a woman who shares her testimony of being morbidly obese and how she made the decision to overcome her obesity - and lost 300 pounds in two years and four months!  Whenever I need to be re-inspired, I will listen again to Jenni's story as it is one of the most inspirational I've ever heard!   Thank you, again, Miriam, for sharing this on our forum on Dotti's Weight Loss Zone - which incidentally is chock-full of inspiring stories, helpful information, and most of all, supportive people, many of whom are a journey similar to mine. 

In a couple of days, I will be traveling to San Antonio to celebrate the holidays with my daughter's family - including these two very precious angels - my granddaughters, Gigi and Hanna.  They also inspire me to stay healthy as I want to be there for them for a very long time!

Other sources of inspiration are fellow bloggers, especially Flo and Miriam.  I so appreciate all that they share on their journeys which in turn helps me tremendously on my own journey. I also appreciate the many others who have cheered me on such as those who have joined my blog - most especially Jan!

I also draw inspiration from members of my family - my husband and my children, especially, as well as from many of my friends, both online and offline.

A few other websites which have inspired me are:

Danica's Daily

Heleen's Blog  (combating eating disorders with biblical meditations)

Fit To The Finish Blog

More about Mindful Eating

I have been blogging about Mindful Eating for a while as it is a topic which I think has a great deal of importance in any successful weight loss program.   I've mentioned mindful eating in earlier posts this year as it is mentioned in the 100 Days Challenge by Linda Spangle.  I've also discussed this with Miriam on her  blog as we both have come to the realization that the elements of Intuitive Eating, which she has researched, in many ways mirror the elements of Mindful Eating.   Miriam and I have often shared our thoughts as we're both on a similar journey - to improve our overall health - and our approaches are much the same in that we believe a program needs to be tailored to our own needs rather than merely follow a program verbatim.

I intend to do multiple readings on the topic of mindful eating and share those readings on my blog as the more I write on a topic, the more I gain an understanding of it.  The image above comes from Susan Alber's article:  The Surprising Benefits of Mindful Eating.  I strongly urge anyone reading this blog to read her article - it is quite comprehensive in its description of mindful eating.  I will be discussing various aspects of the article in my next entry.  

Since I have undertaken some of the elements of mindful eating, I find that I am becoming less and less concerned about the points assigned to each food as per Weight Watchers - even though I am tracking my food with their e-tools.  By becoming more mindful  - or more AWARE of what I eat, how much I eat, how each food tastes - and then knowing when I've reached a level of satisfaction without over-eating - I find that I am subsequently eating healthier and in less quantities.

More discussion on this topic will be forthcoming...

Working Through the Barriers

The second line of the Pledge I took on last week is:  "I will work through the barriers."  I have been fighting one of my primary barriers or obstacles all week - finding excuses not to exercise.  I started on a high note at the beginning of the week, and then lost my "get up and go" by Tuesday!  My husband reminded me why I needed to go to the pool - and reluctantly, I went, but not before I got angry at him - which I know was misplaced anger as I should have gotten angry at myself instead!  Yes, I did apologize to him when I got back - but only after I mulled it over as I swam lap after lap.   I ended up swimming laps for 50 minutes straight - and as always, it felt great afterwards!  I have to ask myself why I often fight myself when it comes to exercise - especially swimming as it's an activity I truly enjoy - though there is the distinct inconvenience of having to drive more than 30 minutes to the pool  while the pool that is closest to me is being renovated. However, today I am slated to do a walk - and all day I've procrastinated and found reasons not to go to the park - just not wanting to move from my "comfort zone" which is all too often right in front of this computer.  So here it is folks:  my primary "barrier" or "obstacle" is  laziness/procratination!  

After admitting my downfall to myself,  I  decided to look up "ways to overcome laziness".  In my research, I found this article on a website called Success Consciousness:   12 Tips to Overcome Laziness - a great article for anyone who also has problems with procrastination - which, as the author states, is a form of laziness.  I found that each and every tip applied to me in some way.  However, two of the tips that I needed to read and re-read in regard are number 5 - Think About Benefits; and number 6 - Thing About Consequences.    While both topics are self-explanatory, I will quote from one of them:

Think About Benefits
"Think about the benefits you will gain if you overcome your laziness and take action, instead of thinking about the difficulties or obstacles. Focusing on the difficulties of the task or action lead to discouragement, avoidance of taking action and to laziness. It is important that you focus your mind and attention on the benefits, not on the difficulties."     Author:   Remez Sasson

This one should be my driving force as exercise for me is all about good health and getting stronger.   I know the benefits - stronger legs, less pain, and perhaps not having to go under the knife - surgical knife, that is.    I also know the consequences (number 5) - weakness and difficulty to walk, painfulness,  and, yes, needing TKR in both knees!  I have been swimming since the summer of 2011 - and I know that each time I've stopped, the pain returns.  I also know that when I start up again, the pain goes away.  I also know that alternating walking with swimming offers even more benefits - by exercising other muscles,  giving me the benefits of fresh air,  etc.

Now, before it gets too late, I need to end this blog - and take a long walk in the park!  I have no more excuses, and there are so many benefits to reap from just a 30 minute walk!  Besides, my dear husband has agreed to walk with me!  :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Addendum:   We just came back from a 35 minute walk!  I started out with some pain in one knee - which all but disappeared within the first 10-15 minutes of walking.   My legs felt better and better as the walk progressed - in fact,  both of us agreed that walking regularly has really helped our overall health - an incentive for us to make this a permanent part of our weekly agenda!

Making a Pledge - to myself

I have addressed how I benefit from logging, blogging and mindful eating.  What I haven't yet addressed is exercise.   In the past, I've mentioned how exercise is my "nemesis",  my "waterloo", my absolutely biggest challenge!   Too often, I have to force myself to MOVE!   I know too well, however, that it is a vital component of this journey.  I do know one can lose weight without adding exercise to their program - albeit at a slower pace.   However, for me, it's not just about "losing weight" - it's more about being healthy!   I have discussed my knee issues (near bone on bone) and how lap swimming with fins and a kickboard has strengthened my legs - compensating in part for the weak knees I have.   Whenever I've stopped swimming - usually when traveling - I feel the pain all over again!   Then I return to swimming and - voila! - the pain goes away!   I alternate swimming with walking - as both address different muscles.  I am aware that I will also need to add weight training so that I can strengthen all my muscles, not only my legs.  I'm also looking into taking a Tai Chi class - which will help with balance and control.

I am borrowing the pledge above and taking ownership of my need to exercise with this as a reminder:

I,  Elizabeth Smith (my formal name),  will be physically active for me, so that I may live longer and feel better.

I will work through my barriers to being active.

I will set activity goals and rewards, get support and track my progress.

I will build up being active and I will choose activities I like to do.

So what have I done this week to address the issue of exercise?

I exercised for 35 to 40 minutes three times this week  (I still have tomorrow so I might well make it four times...).    It's a good start, but it's one I need to build on.   I alternated swimming and walking.   Twice, I attempted to do both in one day - but alas, I need to build up my strength as I was unable to!

I do have a Scale Victory to report today - down three pounds already!  Three pounds in less than a week is phenomenol for me - as I'm usually a "snail" when it comes to losing weight.   However, I cannot become complacent!  If anything, I need to celebrate this and then use it as motivation to keep on keeping on this journey.

A Fresh Start - and a Focus on Mindful Eating

I've redesigned my blog - not major changes, but it does have a fresh look to it which I like!  It also has given me the fresh new feeling which one often has when he/she has decided to start anew. It is indeed "a new beginning".

I have now been tracking my food and exercise for two days.  It actually feels good to be doing both the blogging and the tracking/logging!   I realize now how much it gives me the feeling of being in control, and keeps me accountable.   I want to share a part of an article mentioned by Flo, another DWLZ buddy and co-blogger - on the reasons why keeping a food journal is helpful:

Diet and exercise are only part of the equation when it comes to eating healthier and losing weight. The rest is in your head, and for many people, that's where the real battle is won or lost. To keep your head in the right place, consider keeping a food diary, or a regular log of what you've eaten and when. We don't mean counting calories either (although that can be helpful too.) The simple act of recording your meals forces you to think about what you ate, when you ate it, and how large your portions were.   
 excerpt from article by Alan Henry ("Keeping a Daily Food Diary to Track Your Diet, Lose Weight, and Build Healthy Habits")

I underlined the last line of this as I believe it is what makes or breaks us when we are trying to lose weight - or another way of saying this is "mindful eating".  Mindful eating truly means being fully aware of what we eat, when we eat and how much we eat!   For me, keeping a food journal is the tool that helps me be mindful of what I eat.  In fact, I've been recording most of what I eat in the evening but I now I think that it would be better if I recorded what I plan to eat early in the day.  

As I reflect more and more on the  concept of mindful eating,  it seems that I am coming closer to understanding what works best for me.  Maybe, just maybe I'll find "the key" which opens the door and helps me discover why I've not been as successful as I would like to be, and, more importantly,  helps me reach my goals/dreams of becoming healthier!     your head in the right place, consider keeping a food diary, or a regular log of what you've eaten and when. We don't mean counting calories either (although that can be helpful too.) The simple act of recording your meals forces you to think about what you ate, when you ate it, and how large your portions were.

A Motivational Poster That Says It All!

Wow!   This motivational poster could not have expressed my reasons for reviving my journey better!   Every single reason speaks to me personally!  Truth be told, I have felt my energy being zapped from me lately, I am having more difficulty doing what keeps me active,  I feel my health declining,  I am no longer able to fit into too many outfits in my closet, and I so want to be there for my children and grandchildren!  I have gained way too many pounds since last year (2011) - I've gotten way back to the 200's after promising myself I would not ever do so!   I can no longer say "it's just a number" as I am also feeling the unhealthy repercussions of weight gain - which is basically the antithesis of each of the items in the above poster.   I can add one more - I am just uncomfortable at this weight!  I don't even sleep as well as I used to, and I'm usually a sound sleeper!  

Ok...so now that I've faced the situation square in the face, what am I going to do about it?   First of all, I am back to blogging!   Blogging helps me in so many ways.  As I write,  I find that I cannot hide from the truth.   Blogging gives me "lightbulb" moments when certain realizations come alive as it forces me to ponder seriously what is truly happening on this journey of mine.   For example, it just came to me a few moments ago that my journey is not a straight and narrow road - I take detours, run into obstacles, or I move several steps forward, and then, unfortunately, find myself taking as many or more steps backwards...so it's not that I got off my journey; it's more that I got caught in an emotional upheaval.  I went into a slump when I lost my Mom in September, and then regressed for weeks afterwards.  I'm not beating myself up about it as I realize that mourning a loved one affects our lives in different ways.  However, I am starting to find myself again - and I'm now more than ready to address the areas in my life that I have neglected these past few months.

I'm also returning to Weight Watchers - but this time doing it exclusively online.  My support system will be my husband who will be doing WW with me, and my children who have always been supportive of my journey.  I also have my friends, both on and offline.   I will "use" my support system as much as possible as I recognize the fact that having a support system is not only important but will also facillitate my journey.

Weight Watchers Online consists mainly of an exercise log and food tracking journal - along with advice and recipes and other resources.  I will make use of both the log and journal - and try to do so DAILY!   They both keep me accountable - and serve as a "history" and "record" of my progress, or lack thereof.   I do not see WW as a "diet" - rather I see it as a way to eat mindfully.  It's not just about counting points - in fact, that's the least important part of the program.  If one truly follows the WW way of eating (healthy oils, several servings a day of vegetables and fruits,etc) then what it really does is help us to create healthy/balanced meals as a permanent lifestyle!  It's not pefect, of course, so one does need to tweak the program so that it fits each of us individually.

My next blog entry will be a continued discussion of how I tailor WW to fit my individual needs as well as how I'm melding other resources/aids to assist me on this journey.

Getting Back on Track/ A New Beginning

    After a nearly three month hiatus,  I am finally returning to my blog!  It's not that I've gotten completely off track - it's more that I haven't tracked much of what I've been doing  and so my journey is lacking in accountability and consistency.   Without accountability, it's easy for me to become very lackadaisical rather than focused.   The result is I've gained weight rather than lost weight.    I've decided I need to get back to tracking my journey - and blogging is one of three components I will be taking on this week.   The other two are keeping a food journal and an exercise journal - both of which I will do with Weight Watchers' e-tools.   The latter two will begin this Saturday, December 1st - I will be signing up for three months which will get me well into the New Year.

   It would be great if I could "do it on my own" without having to write down each morsel, log each mile,  and write a self-report on my blog.  However, I've tried doing it without all of these, and for me, it just doesn't work.   I must have a way to be accountable, if only to myself.   I also need support - which I do receive from my family and a few friends, but also via spiritual readings and meditation, which is something that has always helped me overcome any and all challenges in my life.

  I will revisit the 100 Day Challenge which is what my blog was based on when I first started it back in January - but  I will only dwell on the topics that relate to me.   Perhaps by the time I complete the next three months on WW e-tools, I will complete the topics in the challenge.  More importantly, I'm hoping that by then I will be well on my way to reaching my personal goals!  I will re-state my goals in the coming week - as I need to be reminded as to why I decided to take on this journey.

  Since this is a "new beginning", I will not continue the 100 Days Challenge. I will however take on topics from the Challenge that pertain to me as points of discussion.  

100 Days Challenge - Day 45 - The Importance of Food, and Setting New Exercise Goals

"Achievement seems to be connected
with action. Successful men and
women keep moving. They make
mistakes, but they don't quit." - Conrad Hilton 

 I am thrilled to say that I did not just meet my fitness goals this past week, but surpassed my goal  - and did so by exercising  205 minutes rather than the 165 minutes I had set as a goal for myself!  At the beginning of last week, I had set 165 minutes as my goal as I had decided to add ten minutes to the 155 minutes I had exercised the week before last.  This means that I actually exercised FIFTY minutes more than I did the previous week!  What a reversal that is from my usual  - as so often I end up NOT making my goal!    Since exercise has always been my biggest "nemesis", surpassing my exercise goal is truly a significant accomplishment for me.   Yay, me!!!  : )

The "downside" is can I match this during the coming week?  I will temper this by saying that originally, I said I would add ten minutes to my exercise goals each week - so I will set my goal for the coming week at between 150 to 175 minutes.   One reason I feel a need to be a bit "conservative" with my goal for this week is because I am at a "crossroads" with my lap swimming routine.   As of this week, the Y pool is temporarily closed until January of next year - which means I have to make a decision about where I'll be swimming during that time period.  I must choose between our local community center indoor pool or consider going to another Y across town.   The local community center pool is considerably closer but I need to try it out and see if it will work out for lap swimming.  

I'm also picking up where I left off on the "100 Days Challenge" as I would like to complete at least the first 50 "days" before leaving for our rather long trip this month.   The topic for Day 45 is "Food - Is it Important or Not".    This is the introduction to the topic:

Designate specific times to let food be important, then other times, treat it as being unimportant. Since you can’t make food special all the time, be selective with when you call it important. When you spend time with others, you can still choose to let food be unimportant, and instead, focus on giving love and attention to the people around you.

I had two luncheons this past week with friends.  I can honestly say that I have very little recollection of how the food I ate tasted as my focus was on connecting with friends I had not seen for a while.   On the other hand, I indulged in a piece of chocolate today - and definitely paid attention to the wonderful taste of the velvety chocolate on my palate!   So I can say quite readily that I agree with the premises of "food sometimes being important and sometimes being completely irrelevant" which is a summary of the above statement.  I believe the message this translates to is food does not need to be the center of attention in our lives.  In fact, the less we make it the "center of attention", the better! Since we are going to be on a ten day cruise in a few weeks,  this is something I truly need to remember - as it is too easy to become too wrapped up in the food events on the ship.   I will need to get involved in the other ship's events and activities so that meals become less important.  That will be my challenge!

Update:  Well, I've tried out the community pool - and it will not work!   It's not heated and simply doesn't have the conveniences of the Y pool.  No locker room, just a very small dressing room with showers.   This means I'll be trekking across the mountain to the Y pool on the Westside - since that's the side of town where I visit my Mom in her foster care home.    I plan to go twice this week and alternate with walking/treadmill.

  

100 Days Challenge - Reflection

To reach a port, we must sail—

Sail, not tie at anchor—Sail, not drift.
Franklin Roosevelt

Amazing how quotes can truly illustrate an event in one's life. The one above is so a propos as we are preparing for a wonderful Fall New England/Canada cruise - one that has been on my "bucket list" for many years.  Of course the point which I believe is being made in the quote above by FDR is not to allow ourselves to drift aimlessly in life but to "sail towards a destination".  Similarly, one should not lose sight of one's fitness goals and one way to do this is to keep focused and keep moving!!!

Since I'm not ready to move on to the next topic quite yet, I'm going to spend time reflecting on the past week.   How did I do on my self-challenge?   Last Monday, I had written a schedule for the week which included five days of exercise.  I did not do as well as I had planned, but I also did not fail myself.  I got in 155 minutes of exercise spread throughout three days - which one could say averaged out to 30 + minutes of exercise per day for five days.   So maybe what I need to do is challenge myself to a certain amount of minutes per week - while adding 10 minutes or more each subsequent week.   That means that next week I will work towards at least 165 minutes of exercise.  Sounds more do-able to me!    I won't set up a schedule - I'll just alternate swimming and walking as many days as I can.

Unfortunately, I lost my e-tool membership on WW, mainly because I wasn't keeping up with it and did not update my credit card info.   I will not renew or re-join WW just yet, but will consider doing so when I return from our vacation cruise/trip to the East coast - either in October or November.  Meanwhile, I will journal my daily food intake until I leave on the 20th of next month - either here or on DWLZ website.   I will not journal during my vacation - won't be online, anyway - but I will focus on "mindful eating" as well as healthy eating (concentrating on veggies, fruit, yogurt, chicken and seafood).  I also plan on getting in lots of walking, both on the ship and off on shore excursions.   In fact,  I just replaced my pedometer just so I can record steps/miles/calories burned, etc.

Here's hoping for a good week!

100 Days Challenge - Day 44 - This is the Time!

“Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you.“ – Carl Sandburg
“Monday is the key day of the week.“ – Proverb

I just noticed that my last blog post was exactly a month ago, on July 20.   It's time to get back  on track!   And what better way to do this than on a Monday, the beginning of a new week!

Day 44 of the 100 Day Challenge is asking us whether or not this is the right time to be on a weight loss program.   Sometimes life's events do overshadow our journey - and I would say that this is what affected the last couple weeks of my life.   We were on the verge of a major relocation with our family when a drastic turn of events forced us to place the move "on hold".   As a result, we had to change direction and make new plans.   There were also emotions to deal with - not only mine but other family members as well.   Time and patience will bring us together again as we work together to reset our goals and priorities.

My mantra for the coming weeks is to create more structure in my life as I'm now ready to move forward with a daily plan including healthy meals and regularly scheduled exercise.  I know too well that if I'm going to make my days productive, I will have to do it on my own. With that in mind,  this is my schedule of exercise for this week:

Monday - return to blogging, set up my weekly schedule

Tuesday -  morning walk and swimming  

Wednesday -   morning walk

Thursday - lap swimming

Friday - morning walk

Saturday - morning walk and lap swimming

My goal is at least five days of exercise varying from 45 minutes to 1.5 hours per day.  

I also plan to do a self-evaluation at the end of each week.

100 Days Challenge - Day 42 and 43 - Making it Matter and Making Choices

The theme of Day 42 in "The 100 Days Challenge" by Linda Spangle which I am using as a resource on my journey is  Make it Matter.  The description of this theme is:   If you aren’t sure if you really want to take action on something such as your weight, ambivalence will usually win. To get past this roadblock, you have to raise the importance of your goal and make it matter. Think about all the things that bother you about being overweight, then just convince yourself that it’s crucial you make changes in this area.

Since I just re-listed my goals two entries ago, I am not going to restate them here.  I do agree that being overweight is detrimental to my health - there can be no more important reason than this for being at a healthier weight than I am now.   

What I truly need to work on at this time is to stop procrastinating on exercise!  During the last three weeks, I've only gotten in two days of exercise.  While I've had some legitimate reasons for not being able to fit in exercise,  I've also been lazy.   So I'm going to move right on to the theme of Day 43:   Choose To, Not Have To.  The description of this theme is:  Instead of saying, “I have to,” when discussing your actions or goals, substitute the words “I choose to.” Any time you feel like you have to do something, say “I choose to.” Then take steps that move you toward the outcomes you want.  

No, I'm not beating myself about this, but I do need to find a solution.  I feel I need to change my attitude, and start being pro-active rather than negative about the need to exercise.  In the beginning of this journey, I used the phrase:  "Do it Anyway!".  At that time, it worked well for me.   I like the idea of making it a personal choice instead.  We all do much better when we CHOOSE to do something rather than do it because we HAVE TO do it!   Recently, I have been making some other choices in my journey in my daily meals.  For example, I am waiting until I'm hungy (on a scale of 1-5, probably at 3 - in other words, not starving!)  before I eat, which in some cases means skipping breakfast or eating a brunch instead of breakfast and lunch, or eating two meals a day instead of three.  There are times I've also eaten one main meals, and then had a few healthy snack-type meals (ex:  yogurt, berries and granola).   


What I plan to work on at this time is create the same attitude - of CHOOSING TO rather than HAVING TO for my exercise routine.  I will report back about mid-week of next week and evaluate the results of this change of atttitude.   After all, we may not be in control of everything that happens in our lives, but we ARE in control of our own attitude!    

100 Days Challenge - Still Working on Motivation

"Achievement seems to be connected with action. 
Successful men and women keep moving. 
They make mistakes, but they don't quit." 

                                                                                       - Conrad Hilton 


Hard to believe a whole week has passed by since my last post!   Where did the week go???   Truthfully, I've been down in the dumps lately, mainly because I've been gaining weight rather than losing weight!  :(    Not enough focus, and not enough motivation.   I've only gotten in two days of exercise the past two weeks and have made several "transgressions" on my food intake.   Granted, there were  "life happens" type of events which took up a chunk of my time.    However, if I were more motivated, I'm sure I would have found the time to focus more on my journey.   I'm not going to beat myself up about it...I'm just going to do what the runner in the photo above is doing - keep putting one foot in front of the other - literally and figuratively!    


I have learned a few lessons through my above-mentioned "transgressions".   As I posted on Miriam's blog,  at a restuarant this past weekend,  I did something I rarely do - I indulged in a "death by chocolate" cake (shared with my husband) , and sure paid for it later...felt sickly most of that evening and could barely look at food the next morning!  It was way "too rich" for me -  "over the top" in calories and carbs!  Clearly, I have developed sensitivities against such carb-rich items  - a "red-flag" lesson for me, for sure!    My well-being has also been adversely affected with the added weight I've put on this past month or so and I feel like such a "slug"!   That is one feeling I can't wait to lose, along with the five pounds I've put on!


Today is Monday  and while most people dislike Mondays,  Monday to me means a "new week and new beginnings"!   I'm once again taking control!  I started the day with a nice long walk (45 minutes).   I've eaten moderately throughout the day, and will return to my food journal this evening.   One day at a time, I WILL get back to doing what need to do to look and feel healthy. 


I would like to share this poem about MOTIVATION  (from the DWLZ newsletter); it truly spoke to me and where I am TODAY on my journey!


MOTIVATION

There are two days in every week about which we should not worry;


Two days which should be kept free of fear and apprehension;

One of these days is YESTERDAY, 


With its mistakes and cares, its faults and blunders, its aches and pains. 


YESTERDAY has passed forever beyond our control. 


All the money in the world cannot bring back YESTERDAY. 


We cannot undo a single act we performed. 


We cannot erase a single word we said. 


YESTERDAY is gone.

The other day we should not worry about is TOMORROW,

With its possible adversities, its burdens, its larger promise. 


TOMORROW is also beyond our immediate control. 


TOMORROW, the sun will rise, either in splendor or behind a mask of clouds; 


But it will rise.

Until it does, we have no stake in TOMORROW


For it is as yet unborn.

This leaves only one day - TODAY. 


Any man can fight the battles of just one day. 


It is only when you and I add the burdens of those two awful eternity’s - 


YESTERDAY and TOMORROW – that we break down. 


It is not the experience of TODAY that drives men mad.

It is remorse or bitterness for something which happened YESTERDAY


And the dread of what TOMORROW may bring.

Let us therefore LIVE ONE DAY AT A TIME

100 Days Challenge - Life Events vs Motivation

“I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing; it is about having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next.  Delicious Ambiguity.” 
                                                              - Gilda Radner

What I learned this past week is that no matter how much we plan our lives, we cannot predict life's events.  I wrote my last journal entry a week ago yesterday - on Sunday, July 1st, expecting to return to my journey.  Monday went by calmly and I followed my eating and fitness plan  (a 1.6 mile walk).  However, everything went downhill on Tuesday when my Mom went into the ER due to dehydration, and in a very weakened state.   She stayed the entire day in the ER, and then returned to her foster care home with specific instructions to improve her well-being, although at first the cardiologist had wanted her to stay another day in CCU. We decided that staying in the hospital is detrimental to her due to the Alzheimers.  She becomes even more disoriented, filled with anxiety, etc.    The rest of the week was filled with daily visits with Mom and efforts to place her under hospice care as it is clear that she is experiencing a drastic downward spiral. She is probably in Stage 6 now of Alzheimers and has very limited mobility, refuses to eat, and has become very weak.   We placed her under hospice just two days ago and she seems to be stable at this time.

On Thursday evening (the day before my birthday) , I had a surprise visit from both of my children - which certainly lifted my spirits!   We had a wonderful time - and it was truly one of the best birthdays I've ever had!!   However, with all of these family events - the sad one involving my Mom and the happy ones with my children and grandchildren - I once again got off track.   Life happens!   It doesn't matter how much motivation one has, there are life situations that simply do not allow for all the components of this journey. I had no time to journal, and got in just two days of exercise.  The children left yesterday so here I am, attempting to re-start my journey.  I cannot predict how this week will go but I will once again return to setting up my fitness calendar, tracking my food intake, and I am at least back to journaling!   And we'll see how the week progresses...

100 Days Challenge - Day 41 - Motivation is a Choice

Although it may seem like it simply pops up unexpectedly, motivation is actually a choice. You create it yourself through your thoughts, your self-talk, and your attitude. To do this, you have to invent new tricks and create fresh ideas that will inspire you toward action.

                                                                        -Linda Spangle  ("100 Days of Weight Loss")

It's a coincidence that motivation is the next topic in the 100 Days Challenge, as it is clearly one that I need to focus on.   I allowed the entire month of June to go by without journaling.  While that doesn't mean I got totally "off track",   I did lose some of my focus.   The number reason why I journal is to remain focused on my goals and do what I need to do to reach them.    Like many of us,  my level of motivation comes and goes.   However, I don't give up -  no, wait...I  WON'T give up!   I am on this journey for however long it takes...which for me will go way beyond "100 days".    Journaling also forces me to be accountable, though there are other tools which also assist me in that area - specifically, my fitness calendar and my food tracker (though I often don't keep up with the latter).   I let traveling and being away from home be my excuse for dropping my journal, my food tracker and, yes, even my exercise routine!  About the only thing I did was eat with awareness most of the time - and for that reason I only gained a couple of pounds during my month long absence.   

I am remedying all of this with renewed self-motivation.  I have already created my calendar for the coming week, and today I am returning to journaling and tracking my food, as this is what I KNOW I need to do to get back on track.  Yes, this is work - HARD work - but honestly I don't know any other way to make it all happen.   We do what we have to do to get the results that we want.    As I read the quote above by Linda Spangle,  I must admit that I don't know yet what "fresh ideas" I can come up with but I do know that "self-talk" and a positive attitude have a great deal of influence on whether or not I am successful.   We can basically convince ourselves to take any path - or even remain stagnant - but within ourselves, we KNOW not only what works for each of us but also what work needs to be done to get back on track.   

I need to recognize that I am on this journey for myself and not for anyone else.   I want to be healthier, stronger, and improve my over-all well-being.  To underline that I am on a PERSONAL journey, I am going to list again my personal goals as I need to remind myself WHY I am on this journey:

1.  To strengthen my body, especially my limbs and joints.

2.  To lose significant weight which will also help decrease the weight I am presently bearing on my limbs/joints, especially my knees.

3.  To be able to truly enjoy my retirement years by becoming healthier and stronger.

MY OWN PERSONAL ASSIGNMENT:   

To take on more ownership of my journey, I'm going to personalize my assignment.  

My assignment for this chapter on Motivation is to research new and fresh ideas to help "jump-start" my enthusiasm towards my journey.   Perhaps personalizing my assignments is a good start as it's something I've rarely done in the previous 40 days of this challenge!   : )

100 Days Challenge - Day 39 and 40 - Part One: Preparing for an Eating Experience

Once again, I've taken a rather long hiatus from journaling.   Part of it was because I was on vacation last week and I just didn't have much time to sit and reflect.  I did pay attention to my food choices, and got in at least 30 minutes of walking nearly every day.   I have not weighed myself since I returned but I'm probably up a couple of pounds as we ate out often.

I'm back home again, and have returned to my exercise program and have started planning my meals again.   I'm feeling both energetic and relaxed, thanks to a wonderful and exhilerating vacation up in the Colorado Rockies!   I also had a therapeutic experience in the hot mineral springs - and my knees have been thanking me ever since!   Each time I stop my swimming therapy, I start getting twinges in my knees/legs.  Since I didn't swim while I was in vacation, I was feeling a bit of discomfort - but the "healing waters" sure made a difference!   Now I am back to my swimming therapy - and feeling great!

On the 100 Day Challenge, I'm finally finishing the first four decades.  That means 40 chapters done, and "only"  60 to go!   I am determined to finish "the Challenge" no matter how long it takes!   However, I will continue to substitute topics when topics do not apply to me.

Today, I am gearing up for tomorrow's "eating experience"  (topic for Day 40).  I happen to be eating out with a friend at a favorite restaurant called Ripe.  The "assignment" is this:

Intentionally plan to have an eating experience. Let the food become a minor part of your event, perhaps even choosing a simple meal of soup or salad for your experience.  Select a restaurant based on the type of experience you want to have.  

The focus is to determine what have been the most enjoyable eating experiences, and what caused the experience to be so enjoyable, and then to replicate the experience.  This is easy as all enjoyable eating experience have been about the person or persons I've been with.  I enjoy eating out with the people who are special in my life - whether it be with my spouse, or other family members, or my friends.   Tomorrow I am meeting a former colleague who has become a good friend.   I truly look forward to sharing a dining experience with her and sharing stories about our lives as well!  Shari is a culinary arts teacher so I'm sure we will be paying close attention to the culinary delights during our meal!  (note:  see Postscript below)

How did I demonstrate my dedication and commitment to my program?

Exercise -  I did nearly an hour of lap swimming.

Food Plan - I had the following:   Breakfast - Fiber One cereal + unsweetened Almond Milk;  Lunch - crackers and hummus,  an apple ;   Dinner - turkey sausage and a medley of rice and vegetables;  Snacks - 1/2 slice of low-cal ww bread w/tsp of pb;   energy bar; strawberries shortcake (w/angel food cake);   1 small apricot;  Activia yogurt

Postscript:


I find that when I'm enjoying the companionship of my spouse, another member of my family or a friend at a restaurant, that becomes the focus of my dining experience - not the food - which is the way it should be IMO.  Though one might savor the meal as well as the sharing of conversation, food should never take so such great importance that it overshadows the relationship one has with one's dinner companion.  I recall dinner with friends not because of the food I ate but because I love spending time with friends and family.    

100 Days Challenge - Day 38 - Synchronizing My Program

"Energy is the essence of life. Every day
you decide how you're going to use it by
knowing what you want and what it
takes to reach that goal, and by maintaining focus." - Oprah 

Even though I haven't posted in my blog for a week, I have been working hard to protect my program.   I do find a few of the topics in the 100 Day Challenge irrelevant so I've substituted topics from time to time - this is one of those times.   The actual topic is "Food as Power" - and I've pondered over this for a while and honestly cannot relate to it.    Instead, I will discuss where I am right now on my journey.   Seems to be truly what I should be focusing on!   


I do love the quote above by Oprah Winfrey.   It speaks to me since this is exactly what I am doing and need to continue to do - know what I want, know what it takes to reach my goals, maintain focus and use my energy productively so that I can accomplish it all!   There it is in a nutshell!      I actually plan out my Google calendar with my exercise program at the beginning of each week - usually on Sunday.  I schedule 4-5 days of exercise and get in at least three days.   However, there are days I "double-up" -  with 30-40 minutes of aerobic walking and 50 minutes of lap swimming.   All in all, on the exercise front, I'm doing great!  


I'm still not tracking my points on my Food Tracker, and I suspect that that may be why I've been on a plateau for quite some time.  I've been playing with the same two pounds like a "see-saw" for a good six weeks or so  and haven't lost any weight since late March.   I actually think I'm not eating enough and that is backfiring on me!  As I write this, I am resolved to rectify this by returning to my WW Food Tracker TONIGHT - right after I complete this blog entry.  Why is it that when  we admit what the problem is on paper, the solution becomes more obvious!?   Another good reason to continue blogging!   : )


It does seem that either I do well on my Food Plan or I do well on my Exercise Program.   The goal here is then to get them both in sync!   And that, dear friends, is my goal for the week - to create a "holistic program"  - one that actually works together.   Since I've been exercising regularly,  I do have ENERGY - so no excuse really not to get it together.    


Next week, I'll be in the Southern Colorado Rockies - a whole week in Pagosa Springs at a resort!   Nothing to do except spend time relaxing, walking, enjoying the scenery -  and focus on my health, of course!  I intend to bask in the wonderful alpine mountains...and in the mineral hot springs !  : )    A true "Rocky Mountain High"!!!   

100 Days Challenge - Day 37 - A Great Day!

Had a great day today - lots of exercise, eating right - one of those feeling stronger, healthier "on top of it all" kind-of-day!   I'm more prone to WANT to blog when I have one of these days then when I've had a sluggish, "fell off the wagon" kind-of-day".

I woke up  and did my usual morning stretches.   For breakfast, I made both my husband and me a Biggest Loser Protein Shake - added berries and flax seed.  Also ate a Fiber One muffin packed with blueberries.   Then we left for the park and walked at a good, fast pace for 30 minutes  (probably 1.75 miles or so).  We've decided to walk three times a week together - for at least 30 minutes and then build on that.  I also went to the Y pool and did my laps for a good 45 minutes, plus 5-10 minutes of water aerobics.  Wow!  Felt great!!  At home, I cleared out a cabinet  (we're getting ready to move and tons of "stuff" to get rid of).  Felt very energetic - must have been the great "jumpstart" I had at the beginning of the day!  I did feel tuckered out, though, after my swim.  

My food plan went well - had several mini-meals today - starting with the breakfast I described above.  Prior to going to the pool at 12, I had a slice of low cal/ww bread w/pb.  After I came home from the pool, I had a bowl of light Activia yogurt w/a TBSP of plain Greek yogurt - and mixed in strawberries and a TBSP of granola.   At 5 p.m. , I had an apple pecan salad which I had picked up at Wendy's  - added grape tomatoes and 1/2 of an avocado to the salad.  About three hours later, I had a turkey sandwich.  I think I was hungry because of all the exercise I had done!

Hoping to keep up the momentum for the rest of the week!

The topic for Day 37 is "I Love to Eat!".   Really?  Now would I have a weight problem if I didn't love to eat?!!   Actually, this appears to be a prelude to the next topic which is "The Power of Food".   Here are the exercises:

1.  Make a list of foods you absolutely love.  (I have way too many to list...but here are a few - ice cream, yogurt, avocado, all kinds of fish, dark chocolate, all things French (just about!)...and I could go on and on.

 2. Explore what you love about these foods. Consider the flavor and texture as

well as the settings where you typically eat them. (seems we've done this several times already so I'm skipping this one.)

3. In addition to the flavors of good food, notice other things that you love about eating. Is it possible that what you love isn’t related to the food at all? Record your insights below. (this seems to be leading up to the next topic - The Power of Food).

I'll "explore" my feelings about food and share my insights to #3 in the next topic.

100 Days Challenge - Day 36 - Slow Down Your Eating

The topic for Day 36 is "slow down your eating".  This has a domino effect as it also allows one to pay attention to not only the flavors of food but also be able to "pause" so as to know when one has reached the "satisfied" level of eating.  It is true that one eats too fast, there is no time for the feeling of "fullness" vs "just being satisfied" to be recognized.  Unfortunately,  for years, I ate too fast as I was teaching and we had such a short lunch period (30 minutes - but that included getting the food from the fridge in the lounge, heating it up - not to mention bathroom breaks).  Sometimes, it was more like "eating on the run" when I had "school stuff" to do such as running copies, meeting with other teachers, counselors,  students, etc. etc.    Fortunately, I am retired now so I don't have this excuse any more.

Today, I went to a wonderful Champagne Buffet Brunch at a restaurant in Old Mesilla, New Mexico.  I did the "pause" exercise as describe in my last entry.  It worked!  By slowing down and pausing between each part of the meal, I was able to reach a level of feeling satisified and did not over-eat.  As from past exercise, I also savoured the various foods - which also forces one to slow down and I truly focused on enjoying the myriad of flavors.  I also made sure to balance my plate with veggies, salad along with the entrees - a salmon crepe and 1/2 portion of Chicken Marsala.  I did "splurge" on a small piece  (square) of Carrot Cake, however.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 I have set up my weekly goals:
1.  6 days of exercise  (alternating between 2 mile walks and an hour of lap swimming).


2.  I will also continue to try to pause and slow down during meals as I know it will be to my benefit to do so.  


3.  I will TRACK my food points on E-tools on the WW site  (I have not been doing this very regularly which is not in my best interest!).   

4.  I will blog at least four days this week.   By doing so, I will be able to complete another decade of daily topics!